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She who trusts in the Lord will never be disappointed!
Today, I am counting my blessings and reveling in God’s redemptive power for those who trust Him.
Every day for the last 365 days, I have thanked the Lord for opening the eyes of my heart so I would be receptive to His plans for my life. In particular, that I would see and take hold of the blessing He was about to place in front of me when He divinely orchestrated my path to cross with the path of one of His beloved children.
You see, in Fall of 2016, I chose to forgo dating for no less than a year so I could give 100% of my heart to Jesus and His miraculous healing power. At the time, I had no idea what God had in store for my life, and honestly, I didn’t really care. The reality of the life I thought I had was more frightening than any nightmare I could ever dream. The only person I KNEW I could trust was Jesus. So I licked my wounds and resolved to hide in the refuge of His wings indefinitely. Because being with Him was the ONLY place I found solace, I happily snuggled up with Jesus.
I wish I could put into words what the Lord did in my heart, mind, body, and soul as I chose to consecrate myself to Him. He pruned the weeds of brokenness, bitterness, resentment, and anger from the garden of my heart and replaced them with seeds of truth and promises from His Word. Little by little, the clouds began to give way to hope, peace, contentment, and joy not contingent on my circumstances.
Speaking from experience, I can attest to the fact that until we KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that we are loved by our Heavenly Father, we can not fully love ourselves or anyone else. When we think we have to earn love or approval, unconditional love is not in our vocabulary. We anticipate that people will leave us, so we withhold. We create little closets in the broken parts of our heart where we hide the hurt and leave no room for lifelong, unconditional love to take root. Because God rescued me from my greatest fear coming true: fear of abandonment and rejection, I no longer have a reason to hide.
Fast forward to March 3, 2018, 18 months following my self-imposed state of singleness. Because God’s timing is ALWAYS the PERFECT timing, He orchestrated my path to cross with the path of a handsome, charming, intelligent, kind, compassionate and Godly man. Happy Anniversary, Jay Worley! Thank you for being patient with me, loving me and respecting my desire to serve and glorify God. Thank You for recognizing that unless God is at the center of a relationship, it will never be fruitful or fulfilling. I love you!